Monday, December 28, 2009

More pictures through this year :)

I could not fit all the pictures I wanted to, to show some stuff through this past year here are a umm few more :)

Reflections of this year

Lots of pictures!

Well we are now about to end yet another year, I still find it so funny that when you are a child the year just creeps on by, but when you are an adult especially one with children it just seems to fly by! Well this year has been all about some valleys but coming up climbing to the top of the mountain, not there quite yet :) I really wish I could also recall alot of went on last year but I can remember a few moments.

Last year we lost my grandma but I am so thankful that I got to see her and see her awesome testimony unfold while I was there. I am still praying for my dad as he is still having a hard time with her being gone. My grandpa and sister n law got to spend Christmas with us last year and I loved every minute of it, I love having alot of family around, makes us remember special times and grow just alittle closer :) I will miss them alot this Christmas. Taylor took his first steps around January and has been chasing his brother and dancing up a storm! Ok that just brought me back, I can not believe my sweet boy has been walking for almost a year!! He absolutely loves to dance a sing. He tickles me pink when he starts to dance and then to start singing, he will laughing so hard I start to cry! He is learning to say so many new words. Loves to call for his "bubba" and has now started calling Josh daddy!! He walks around looking for "lilo"..."milo" the cat. He is really learning to speak so well and has learned so much since we moved to MS. He is learning by watching big brother how to pray and will say AMEN! at the end of our pray. I really could go on but I am afraid you might have stopped reading by now

Caleb, my little man. He has made me just so proud this year. He has really started taking an interest in knowing more about God and Jesus and that makes my heart melt. He loves to say grace at the table every night. He has now takin a liking to setting the table too, please no one tell him that it is a chore, later on he will consider that a chore :) He is so kind and so compassionate, makes me cry the things he does for people just because! He is very strong willed but we are learning this year and in the years to come, how he can use that in a positive way and for the Kingdom of God! I love when he came up to me and said "mommy, come" me "come where Caleb"..."no mommy COME" ..."what??" "mommy...come now is the time to worship" that made my heart melt! And now he is getting into the joke telling

Joshua, oh my strong, loving, CHRIST loving and searching husband. I think he has learned alot this past year. He has been put through some "light showers" :) and became somewhat frustrated at times, but in the end found just what he was searching for and has made me so proud to be his wife. He is so forgiving and has put his own pride aside to do the will of God! He is working at a mill and while this is much different from his old job, he couldn't be happier and I feel so blessed to be married to such a man to do such hard work in the cold for his family! God shown us many things this year and though it probably actually took us a couple of years to figure it out I think we are on the right track. Josh always makes me smile with the things he says. Just for example a lady at our church asked Josh how to spell Caleb's name. Josh's response...Caleb...Q, "the Q is silent so people usually forget to add it" :0 ) He is just so funny, annoying at sometimes, but mostly funny! I love him with more and more everyday!

You all have read about all the things I have been through with my depression and Josh losing his job then to having to move, but God has done all these things for His good and am grateful to be able to see all the wonderful things He has shown me. One of my greatest moments this year was seeing my sissy get married and being apart of something so wonderful. During a time where we were going through alot and I was feeling pretty down, I was able to be apart of something God made into a beautiful love story. She is now in Italy with her new hubby and getting to see alot of God's beautiful work, I miss her ALOT! but she is spending it with the love of her life! Moving to MS was a hard move leaving my family, my wonderful church family and friends, but God is supplying others not to replace but to add to :) We have started going to a new church home and it is an awesome church, feel so blessed to get to know the people and for our pastor who has helped us in so many ways! Also we moved in with Josh's parents which was a huge adjustment but we are all learning from each other and I know by the end of this experience we will have a greater understanding and love each other so much more....I hope :). I do miss my mom, dad and brother alot but I get to talk to them very often, and I have taken a couple of trips to see them and have more in my future!

While some people might write about their New Years Resolutions, I don't usually have any of those because I never follow through and I should be starting those now. There are however a few things that I may going to really work on to be better!

1) Seek God more- can't we all do this, seeing how we are never where he wants us to be. I want to dig deeper is his word. Discover what He wants from me. Sing more praises in His name! Show His love more to others, showing compassion! I am so thankful to be free from alot of the stuff that was holding me back this year, now I still have alot to set free but I know His grace will push me towards a much deeper level!

2) My marriage- Josh and I have an awesome marriage, but I know on my part I could be so much more to him. Give him more hugs, smooches and just being the wife he needs and deserves. Not being so prideful with him, he is usually the one to come and say I am sorry first even if it is my fault, that is so sad!!

3) A mother-I want to focus more on my children and really show them the love of Christ and for them to understand it! I want to spend less time with just me! I know it is important to have some me time, I really just don't want to be selfish and demand it, if it comes great if not I just love the time I have with my family! I can be so much more to them. They have already helped me with my journey with Christ, they show me things in a new light and I just want so much to be there for them! I am working hard so that I can come home and be with them soon, I miss that so much!

I really hope I did not lose any of you, God has done so many things even just here recently, you have read about our jobs and our house. I can't wait to see what other "showers" He has for us, well I might now be excited but I am to see how His glory will shine. I love looking back through my year or years to see where He has brought me from and even though I am not where I need to be, man I am not the person I used to be either and that is a huge blessing! I pray each of you has a had a great year and if you are in any storm that God will show Himself to you and you find the peace you need! May you also have a great New Year!!

Friday, December 25, 2009

Thoughts and Prayers this Christmas

Weeping may endure for the night; but joy cometh in the morning~~Psalm 30:5b This verse was coming to my mind as my thoughts and prayers are with my friend Emily and her family. Her daddy past away this morning, and has we celebrated the birth of our Savior today, God was celebrating the arrivial of one of His children! My prayer is that God just holds that family so tight and that they feel His arms wrapped ever so tight around them and even if it takes time that they find peace. Emily your family is in our family's prayers, I can't seem to find words to tell you but I know God knows them, I love you dearly! Amber

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

That's why you have us!

So yesterday when I got home from work Josh mom said she had a couple of stories to share with me and I thought they were so sweet and funny I really wanted to share, plus I posted a blog about Taylor so I do not want to show favoritism, they better appreciate this later :0)
Nana said that the kids had asked for a tootsie roll and she said they could have one, well when she went to go get it she past by it because she had kinda forgotten, well Caleb and Taylor said "Nana!" she said "What"..."you said we could have a tootsie roll"..."oh yeah I forgot, Nana's thinker is not working today" Caleb then said "Nana that is why you have us!!" that was so funny and yet so sweet!!
In the same day Nana was asking Caleb how old he would have to be to sleep on his own, ok right here I have to say that we are awful Caleb still sleeps with us and we usually stay in his bed until he falls asleep, there I said it now let all the awful comments I deserve to come in :0) Anywho Caleb slowly held up his 4 fingers so Nana then asked "Caleb how old are you" ok I am already chuckling!! Then Caleb slowly held up his little hand of 5 fingers!!! He is such a hoot!!
My little superheros!
Well I hope you have a your dose of my chitlens, oh and here is an update on Caleb. He will be having surgery on the lump that is under his chin on Jan.4. I really stand in awe of him of how brave he is, he is like my own superhero :) He kinda thinks of this has his own little adventure, the last time we talked about it he told all about what the doctor was going to do and was not scared, unlike his mommy! I really don't know where he gets all this courage from cause I know it is not me, I think it is from his daddy or maybe his Heavenly Daddy :) Please if you would keep Caleb...and our family(me!) lifted in your prayers.
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.~Joshua 1:9

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth! :)

I just wanted to take a brief moment to share a few of Taylor's milestones, he is so smart,funny, a handful but I have been so proud to see him grow up so much in the time we have been in Mississippi! Also if you did not notice the title is from Rush Hour, I hope no one thinks I was being rude :) *warning a bunch of cutest is about to be read :)* Here are a few things that he can now say!
* Daddy!!-as many of you know that for the longest time he called him mommy, just for the fun of it, that is his little funny personality coming out!
*"I tuck"-meaning I am stuck because I am some where I don't need to be, funny story one morning I heard him crying I run in to see what was wrong. I look all around and could not see him. I said "Taylor where are you?" then I heard "mommy I tuck" I go and look and there he was stuck between the bed and his crib!!
*"et me"- meaning get me! Which is what he says at the end of each dinner calling "Pop et me"! Wanting his Pop to chase him around the house. I just love those moments!
*Amen-this has to be my favorite because he is now understanding about prayer and that just warms my heart! Him and Caleb both get very upset if we do not say "grace"(that is what Caleb likes to say now) before each meal. Sometimes you will see Taylor bow his head say a couple of gibberish words then AMEN!! So sweet! Caleb usually does the honors at dinner but every once in awhile Taylor likes to say it. Taylor also does not like to go to bed without prayer, I think it might be a stalling technique but for now we will say it is so sweet :), but he will go "eh,eh" bow his little hands and start his little words he knows! I just love this, that both of my boys are understanding and loving to pray!
*"es ham"- Yes ma'am is that one, he is learning really great manners. He says "eeezzz" and "ank you" But when he is in trouble and I say "what do you say Taylor" he will go "es ham" :)
*Cheeetooss-my child loves cheetos, really he likes the big puffy ones but will walk over to the chip drawer and say "cheeto, cheeto!!" Love it!

*I don't wont it!- this is a fav of his, when he is being alittle ornery and does not want something! Or he also says "I wont it" says that when he really wants a toostie roll :)

*"rry"-when he thinks he has really done something wrong or mean he will say sorry in his own way and give lots of kisses!!!

*bocick-this would be pocket, which is where he believes he can find all his bibby's!

*he also calls for "lilo" which is Milo, he loves this cat and follows that poor cat everywhere.

*last night I caught him looking at Caleb's flash cards saying "B,,ck,ck,ck", he was saying the letter B and acting like he was sounding it out, I love that he is trying to learn and understands that concept

There are so many more but I will spare you I just wanted to put some of my fav's! He is forming sentences now and I am just so proud of him. He really loves like I say all the time about him to dance and sing! It is one of the things that just makes the world stop for a moment and I just grin because it is so sweet! Hope you enjoyed just a taste of my little Taylor toot!!

Monday, December 14, 2009

Give this Christmas away with Christmas Memories

Last night we had our Adult Cantata and it was titled "Christmas Memories" and I was so touched by all of it. I just loved hearing about different peoples memories of their Christmas's or how this Christmas might be alittle different. Well this year is alittle different for us and I must admit that I was alittle bummed but my 4 year old and some awesome mentors from our church helped me to just open my eyes a bit. See many of you have heard my story about telling Caleb that this year for Christmas he might only get a gift or two it wouldn't be like other Christmas's or even his birthday's. Well to my attonishment he was really ok with it and that made me so proud, just that he wouldn't pitch a fit because he was only getting a few things but he is just so special in that way. Of course he followed up by asking for a pet snake and then a mole when I said no the snake, and then when asked where did he come up with that, he simply replied "Jesus told me" :P Then last night I heard some stories of some of the ladies who have lost their husbands either a few years ago or just recently and it brought my grandpa to mind this year he will be without my grandma, last year he was too but he came a spent Christmas with us, well I am just in love with this song "Give this Christmas away" by Matthew West with Amy Grant. It says if there is love in your heart don't let it stay. I couldn't think of a better way to express Christ birth than showing the love of Him to others. Whether it be by a phone call, a letter, a visit, baking cookies or showing Christ love to someone who is not on your Christmas list, it is easy to give to someone who you like but what could make your heart stronger than to love someone who hasn't show you that kind of love :) you can do so many things to show love to someone which is what God did for us, when Christ was born and to later suffer and die on the cross. I am hoping to give this Christmas to my grandpa by a letter to him and a phone call on Christmas to let him know how much I love him, I really wish I could be there or him here but God knows his needs and I know he will be surrounded by those who will also show love to him. So I ask you how will you give this Christmas away?

Sunday, December 6, 2009

My little Taylor toot :)

Some love for our little newborn baby!
this is our first family pic I just adore this picture of them
checking on him!
It is so hard for me to believe that 2 years ago we brought home another little bundle of joy. You were so quiet, sweet and cuddly! Well you are still sweet and cuddly but boy have you grown to become such alittle Mr.Personality that you make me have to think that you are still so little, at least in my eyes! I can honestly say that in the beginning of me becoming a mommy I wanted so many children but rethought that after I had Caleb, I didn't know how I could share my love, but as soon as I held you in my arms and you looked up at me that all changed you put a love in my heart that is just undescrible. I have alot of memories of you in my belly.
One of the first was driving up to see Pop and Nana to deliver the news of their second grandchild, it was really neat because they just thought we were coming for a visit in their new home, We also took a youth camp trip and I think I do need to tell you that I am sorry because we were in a church van with umm about 15 BOYS!!! and no A/C, ok those two do not mix well for a prego women. But I think we did rather well and we got alot of exercise while we were there! I can remember prepping your big brother so much for you, and he loves you with every ounce of himself and he loved when you first came home! You love your "bubba" so much and just want to do and say just about everything he says, you too make me laugh just when I think I have had the worst of all days. Since we have been here the past 6 months you have gained quite the personality one of my favs right now is when you "toot" and you say"tat was daddy" ...."no Taylor that was you"...."bubba?, Pop?, Nana?", already blaming everyone else! Oh and there was the time you tried to eat a bee oh how you love to eat :)! I love that you absolutely love to sing and dance, it is the funniest thing and yet still so sweet! You bring alot of laughter into our lives and I am so thankful that God has allowed me to be your mommy, my little Taylor toot!!
Sorry for it being kinda dark but he is so funny, watch his foot, it has alittle hop in it!

Thursday, December 3, 2009

The Spirit of Christmas

So I betcha don’t know what time of year it is…J Well it is this time of year that everyone starts to put up decorations, sing Christmas songs, cook all sorts of yummy goodies and giving presents galore! And there seems to be a lot of snowmen, angels, nativity scenes, santa's and Jesus is the reason for the season. Now don’t get me wrong I love Santa and I don’t really have a problem letting my kids believe in him, there is a new Veggie Tales movie out that is really great and talks about St.Nickolas and the meaning behind Christmas. And I also do know that Jesus is the reason that I am celebrating this special time of year but to me Christmas is so much more than that in my heart, it is about compassion, grace, giving, mercy and love. I would love to share a story with you that really made a lot of these things real in my heart.

There was a girl who had just moved by herself into a little one bedroom apartment, and for the first time in her life she was spending Christmas by herself. She didn’t have a tree or decorations. See her and her family were not in the best of terms so she wasn’t spending Christmas with them this year. The women at her work knew the situation and about 2 weeks or so before Christmas, while she was just working away at the drive-thru at the credit union, they all called her name and asked if she could come to the front. As the girl was standing there, all her friends were standing there with a smile on their face. They presented her with a 3 foot Christmas tree and decorations for it. The girl just started crying in the middle of the credit union, just when she thought she might have a terrible Christmas, her friends showed her such love and made all the difference in the world to her. She rushed home that night and put all the decorations up and prayed thanking God for putting such wonderful people in her life. The girl in this story is me and that Christmas really changed my heart about what Christmas to me was about. God showed such love to us by sending His son, to this unruly earth. I could go on about the rest of His story but I think you all know it. Christmas to me is about Jesus but it also about your heart and where it is. There can be santa's, giving and goodies but make sure where your heart lies.

Monday, November 30, 2009

Is the big bad wolf wearing a plastic smile

I almost didn’t post this blog because well to be frank I let my insecurities get the best of me. See I really great friend of mine posted a blog about something similar to what I am writing about. And I didn't want it to look like I took her idea but we just have the same kind of thinking sometimes. But she told me just as God was telling me, different things may speak to different people. So now here is my big bad wolf J

Remember how I had mentioned that my children have encouraged me with my walk with God, well the other night we were having our storytime before bed, like we have every night. And one book Caleb picked out was “The Three Little Pigs” and reading about each pig made me kinda realize something, I know how strange am I to be getting something from a children’s book, and to top that about 3 little pigs, a wolf and God?

Well I was thinking about how the first two pigs built their houses out of straw and the second out of sticks and they did it to be lazy. So I was thinking how many times do I build up these walls “to help me” whether it be a wall I build up for quiet time but build it lazily, maybe saying a wall is the wrong word but what I mean is when I put on a front or stand in a “house” for my quiet time but rush through it to get on to the next thing on my list. Or I build another house with a plastic smile. You know when someone truly want to know my heart and try to encourage me, only for me to say everything is just peachy. Then the big bad wolf comes to tear them down because they were not made strong and sturdy, you know with a great foundation. I hope I am making some sense, to me it sounds ok but who know you might be thinking I have lost it J

And in my though process of this I really wanted the big bad wolf to be the devil, blame it on him who blows down my house, but I don’t believe he can blows down the walls of our heart, not if I am a child of God. Then who is the big bad wolf who huffs and puffs…I believe it is myself/ourselves.

This is where I feel I feel into depression. See I was diagnosed with severe depression a couple of years ago and have went to see many people, but I always put up these walls, thinking there was no hope for me or that I really knew they could not help me. Now I really want to say right now that this is how I have overcome this and I just hope it will encourage you to try but if not it is ok, it is the testimony God has done for me. I went through a rough spot in my childhood they just brought me to a place where I felt no love and rejected, had thoughts of killing myself but just couldn’t do it, I know someone(God) was helping with that. I kept build houses around myself built out of straw and sticks but would just tear my own self down with my insecurities. So I just gave up thought this was just how it was going to be, I do have to say though I have got an awesome husband who I can share anything with and he loves me just the same, thank you Josh for all your unconditional love and bearing with me J But a couple of months ago I went and saw someone else one last time went through a process called EMTR and they put me back on anti-depressants nothing seemed to be working, actually one of the meds I was taking made me have suicidal thoughts. I actually told my husband to shoot me in the head one night, he just held me and prayed for me! So that was the final straw for me, I knew something else needed to happen, I was tired of hiding behind the houses built of straw and sticks. I wanted to in the strong brick house of my Lord Jesus! And it is there that I found my JOY! You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy~~Psalm 30:11

This is how I believe I have overcome my depression it is a daily thing. But I wake up every morning with great thoughts of what the Lord has done for me, and I just begin to have such a JOY in me, I know some of you are saying but I have a chemical imbalance and I did too, but I also think that is something that has helped me, I am in no way saying that you don’t need medicine or someone professional but it just did not work for me. I just feel in my life I have to much to be joyful about to let things bring me down to a point where I am just so sad, I could be going through much worse and if I do I know that my strong house will with stand all of that. I try to just live my day filled with thoughts of God’s grace and mercy. Now I am not saying I don’t have a bad day but I do not try to let that consume my entire day’s thoughts. I know I have probably gotten on my in-laws nerves because I am always saying to smile or to be joyful, it really is because I just don’t like to see anyone down or even if they are tired I just would want to help so that it may help and put them in a great mood, maybe J It also helps me out, I know seems alittle selfish uhh. I really am hoping this is making some sense. I just know that when I put thoughts of God’s love, grace and mercy everything else seems so small compared to that. I just want to bring alittle encouragement more for me to build my house out of the strong love of Jesus that can with stand anything and for maybe to put a little joy in your heart.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit~~Romans 15:13

Monday, November 23, 2009

God has a perfect plan!

This week is Thanksgiving, and I can’t think of a better way to give thanks to my Lord than to give this awesome testimony of his grace, mercy and triumphantness!! See many of you know our current situation of our house and moving, but many don’t know what all has gone on in my heart and just wanting to give up! I am about to share some stuff that I really hope that you won’t look down on me but see how our Savior rose from someone who did not show His glory all to well and made His glory just shine! See we have made some very poor financial problems in the past and that is part of what landed us where we are, which I know was a God’s plan, but when we got here things still did not seem to be working out. We were/are really struggling to make a lot of things happen. We were past due on a lot of our bills but there just wasn’t anything there. There came a point where I just wanted to give up the house just foreclose on it! I doubted God’s plan, but didn’t realize that is what I was doing. I am so ashamed to say that, that I doubted Him but I one point I did, I really tried hard to stay strong in my faith but there were days that were really hard, he kept telling me “Amber I have a plan, and it is coming together” L There are two verses that kept sticking out and I would turn to. For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.~Jeremiah 29:11 a very familiar verse but He says for I know! He knows our plans and His timing is always perfect! He says in Matthew and in Luke Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life, worrying about things is not going to get me anywhere but praying and my faith will take me to where He needs me to be.

So just last week I was looking at different options with our house, not foreclosure, and again He kept saying please just wait! Well on Sunday night a friend of ours house caught fire and they lost just about everything and we got a call from our former pastor and he asked if we might be willing to let them stay at our, well there was not a doubt in my mind to say yes! Well now they may need somewhere long term and they are going to look at renting OUR house. Okay tell me that was not His perfect plan! But even if they don't I still think that was His showing He has a plan! But when I did find out on Saturday I was in the shower and I just broke down and sobbed, just so ashamed of how can I doubt such a faithful God who shows himself to me time and time again, I just look at my family and where we were 7 years ago and where we are today, He got me through that and is being glorified through that, how could I doubt Him with this, so I just cried well I could feel Him wipe my tears away and say "Amber, my child, why are you sad this should be a joyous time, do not be sad of how it came, be joyful and let my glory shine!" So I now cry tears of pure joy, I have a moment about everyday where I just cry about how perfect His timing was, for "some" reason we could not sell our house and we were not "able" to get the funds together to rent it out hmmm tell me He doesn't know timing :) I am still in shock, which really why am I, of what has happened! I am just so thankful my Savior, who knows that I will doubt still shows Himself so triumphant!

Just an update on how wonderful our Savior is just found out that the they will be moving in and the insurance will be paying our full mortgage!! This just blows me away, He is such a God who provides, I can't even find the right words right now to describe how I am feeling. I am so thankful for who He is and what He does!! I fell blessed beyond belief~Let us therefore come bodly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in the time of need~~Hebrews 4:16

Friday, November 20, 2009

I think I ran out of gas?

Today I was on my way to work, and normally I have a care free ride to work, well this morning as soon as I pulled out of our driveway, I saw three cars in the road, one looking like mine. As a got a little closer I saw that it was, there was Josh, his dad and some older lady I think. I asked if everything was ok and Josh dad said she ran out of gas. I asked Josh if he had stopped to help her, he said yes. He was now late for work but he didn’t care, I was so proud, I don’t even know if proud is the right word, it just put a wonderful feeling in my heart. Josh has always done things like that though, he always stops to help someone in need, he probably wouldn’t want me to tell you that because he just doesn’t like to tell everyone when he helps someone, so shhhh J Well that got me thinking about how we, as servants of God, sometimes run out of gas. We become so busy with our lives that we fail to see those who are in need of our service. We (and I am so including myself in this) tell ourselves that I don’t have time, I barely get time with my family, how can I possibly help them with theirs. I feel so convicted of this because I believe we are to put others before we put ourselves. I try really hard to do this but fail so many times it really makes me sad, but I am so thankful that God puts that little feeling in my heart to tell me that I need to learn from these mistakes and do right the next time, isn’t grace wonderful! When I think about helping others I always come to this verse “Dear children, let us not love with words and tongue but with truth and action”~ 1 John 3:18. We are not only to tell people things they may want to hear but to do them with actions. How powerful will our witness be to not only to non-believers but to those who do believe. I don’t know if I am making any sense it makes sense in my head. To me a lot of things come down to showing compassion to one another, many who know we know that I am huge on compassion, I am not perfect but I believe in the depths of my heart that things in our own life could be so much better if we showed compassion to one another, take the focus off ourselves and put it to those who are hurting whether it be spiritually, financially, I know there are others but my brain is not thinking of them right now J I really could go on about compassion because I believe so strongly in it. It can repair broken relationships by just showing a bit of love! I will save this for something else, but I urge you if you feel like you are running out of gas, like I feel at times turn to the one who never runs out and will always fill up your tank…Our Savior!!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

These are the moments

Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."~Matthew 19:14

As I was leaving this morning, after giving my wonderful children hugs and kisses and telling them I love them. I was about to walk out the door and Caleb said “mommy you have a great day at work!” That just made my heart melt. Josh’s dad asked Caleb why he was buttering me up for he responded “Because she is special!” Okay I had tears in my eyes about this time. Josh dad then said “why is she special”…”because I love her!!” I said “Caleb I love you too” and had to leave because my eyes were filled with a lot of tears, tears of joy! These are moments that I hold tight in my heart. Ok so I am adding something new since this morning, at the dinner table tonight Caleb said "mommy you are the best mommy in the whole world!" Man I can not begin to tell you how much God just knew that I needed those words from my children since I have not been at home with them and Caleb is just so sweet with his words!!

Let me tell you becoming a mother has brought me to a different level of my relationship with God, it has actually brought me closer, having my kids as made me think a lot about my relationship with Him. I really want to dig deep because I want to be the best I can be for them and I know that He is the only one who can help me with that. I want to be able to give the answers from the word, when they ask those tough little questions. Like Caleb has already asked questions like…how is God everywhere? How does He live in my heart? And they have made me rethink my actions as well. I am not a morning person but I have found that I needed to be for them, how can I be in a bad mood when I wake up to them. So now I sing a song just about every morning, and Caleb sings it with me. I sing “Rise and Shine and give God the glory, glory!!!” And it just seems to put me in such a great mood, I make more of an effort to just smile and be joyful because I do have a choice to be that way. Now not every morning or even everyday am I that way but I do try really hard to do so. I cherish all the moments I do have because they are only that for a moment, but they hold tight to my heart. I really just want to go on and on of all the moments that stick out like Taylor saying “es ham” (yes ma’am) or “I elp ooo” (I help you), Taylor running around the house yelling “FOOTBALL!!!” when he sees anything related to football. I could tell you numerous jokes that Caleb has said, many you have seen on facebook …”the car is outside mommy” J “His wonderful Christmas list”. Ok see I told you I could go on. ~This is the day the LORD has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it