Monday, December 28, 2009

Reflections of this year

Lots of pictures!

Well we are now about to end yet another year, I still find it so funny that when you are a child the year just creeps on by, but when you are an adult especially one with children it just seems to fly by! Well this year has been all about some valleys but coming up climbing to the top of the mountain, not there quite yet :) I really wish I could also recall alot of went on last year but I can remember a few moments.

Last year we lost my grandma but I am so thankful that I got to see her and see her awesome testimony unfold while I was there. I am still praying for my dad as he is still having a hard time with her being gone. My grandpa and sister n law got to spend Christmas with us last year and I loved every minute of it, I love having alot of family around, makes us remember special times and grow just alittle closer :) I will miss them alot this Christmas. Taylor took his first steps around January and has been chasing his brother and dancing up a storm! Ok that just brought me back, I can not believe my sweet boy has been walking for almost a year!! He absolutely loves to dance a sing. He tickles me pink when he starts to dance and then to start singing, he will laughing so hard I start to cry! He is learning to say so many new words. Loves to call for his "bubba" and has now started calling Josh daddy!! He walks around looking for "lilo"..."milo" the cat. He is really learning to speak so well and has learned so much since we moved to MS. He is learning by watching big brother how to pray and will say AMEN! at the end of our pray. I really could go on but I am afraid you might have stopped reading by now

Caleb, my little man. He has made me just so proud this year. He has really started taking an interest in knowing more about God and Jesus and that makes my heart melt. He loves to say grace at the table every night. He has now takin a liking to setting the table too, please no one tell him that it is a chore, later on he will consider that a chore :) He is so kind and so compassionate, makes me cry the things he does for people just because! He is very strong willed but we are learning this year and in the years to come, how he can use that in a positive way and for the Kingdom of God! I love when he came up to me and said "mommy, come" me "come where Caleb"..."no mommy COME" ..."what??" "mommy...come now is the time to worship" that made my heart melt! And now he is getting into the joke telling

Joshua, oh my strong, loving, CHRIST loving and searching husband. I think he has learned alot this past year. He has been put through some "light showers" :) and became somewhat frustrated at times, but in the end found just what he was searching for and has made me so proud to be his wife. He is so forgiving and has put his own pride aside to do the will of God! He is working at a mill and while this is much different from his old job, he couldn't be happier and I feel so blessed to be married to such a man to do such hard work in the cold for his family! God shown us many things this year and though it probably actually took us a couple of years to figure it out I think we are on the right track. Josh always makes me smile with the things he says. Just for example a lady at our church asked Josh how to spell Caleb's name. Josh's response...Caleb...Q, "the Q is silent so people usually forget to add it" :0 ) He is just so funny, annoying at sometimes, but mostly funny! I love him with more and more everyday!

You all have read about all the things I have been through with my depression and Josh losing his job then to having to move, but God has done all these things for His good and am grateful to be able to see all the wonderful things He has shown me. One of my greatest moments this year was seeing my sissy get married and being apart of something so wonderful. During a time where we were going through alot and I was feeling pretty down, I was able to be apart of something God made into a beautiful love story. She is now in Italy with her new hubby and getting to see alot of God's beautiful work, I miss her ALOT! but she is spending it with the love of her life! Moving to MS was a hard move leaving my family, my wonderful church family and friends, but God is supplying others not to replace but to add to :) We have started going to a new church home and it is an awesome church, feel so blessed to get to know the people and for our pastor who has helped us in so many ways! Also we moved in with Josh's parents which was a huge adjustment but we are all learning from each other and I know by the end of this experience we will have a greater understanding and love each other so much more....I hope :). I do miss my mom, dad and brother alot but I get to talk to them very often, and I have taken a couple of trips to see them and have more in my future!

While some people might write about their New Years Resolutions, I don't usually have any of those because I never follow through and I should be starting those now. There are however a few things that I may going to really work on to be better!

1) Seek God more- can't we all do this, seeing how we are never where he wants us to be. I want to dig deeper is his word. Discover what He wants from me. Sing more praises in His name! Show His love more to others, showing compassion! I am so thankful to be free from alot of the stuff that was holding me back this year, now I still have alot to set free but I know His grace will push me towards a much deeper level!

2) My marriage- Josh and I have an awesome marriage, but I know on my part I could be so much more to him. Give him more hugs, smooches and just being the wife he needs and deserves. Not being so prideful with him, he is usually the one to come and say I am sorry first even if it is my fault, that is so sad!!

3) A mother-I want to focus more on my children and really show them the love of Christ and for them to understand it! I want to spend less time with just me! I know it is important to have some me time, I really just don't want to be selfish and demand it, if it comes great if not I just love the time I have with my family! I can be so much more to them. They have already helped me with my journey with Christ, they show me things in a new light and I just want so much to be there for them! I am working hard so that I can come home and be with them soon, I miss that so much!

I really hope I did not lose any of you, God has done so many things even just here recently, you have read about our jobs and our house. I can't wait to see what other "showers" He has for us, well I might now be excited but I am to see how His glory will shine. I love looking back through my year or years to see where He has brought me from and even though I am not where I need to be, man I am not the person I used to be either and that is a huge blessing! I pray each of you has a had a great year and if you are in any storm that God will show Himself to you and you find the peace you need! May you also have a great New Year!!

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