My heart hurts

When my brother was younger, around 6 or 7, he started saying that his heart hurt, there was a pain in his chest. So after many doctors visits and scans of some sort, we found out that it was just him growing, a growth spurt. Well now my heart hurts, but it does hurt like his did, I think mine is because I am “growing” spiritually and sometimes that hurts. Not because of what God is doing (because that has been awesome) but because of what I have done or how I am feeling. Have you ever just felt torn about how you should feel…Be strong, God wants us to be strong, it is ok to cry, don’t let things get to you, be sensitive, the list could go on! But sometimes I just want to go AHHH!!!! I don’t how I should feel right now, and that just makes my heart hurt. But on my way to work today me and God were having our usual morning talk and I was talking to Him about all of my feelings and I would just like to share a few things I feel like He told me about all the things I am feeling. Be strong- The LORD is my strength and my song~~ Exodus 15:2a I know that I don’t have to always be strong, lets face it I can’t be strong all the time but I do know that the Lord gives me my strength and when I think I can’t keep going, He always provides a way for me to find strength…it is called prayer. In Matthew 14:23 Jesus was done with the day and went to the mountain to pray. Jesus had just dealt with His dear friend John the Baptist being beheaded, healed the sick, and fed the 5000(men, not including the women and children) so I think He needed some strength and guidance which is why He went to pray. That is where I should be, I need strength and guidance and I am only going to get that from one, My Lord. Now I don’t think that it is the amount of time I spend with Him but what I discover while I am there with Him. It is ok to cry-The LORD has heard my cry for mercy; the LORD accepts my prayer~~Psalm 6:9 Boy am I glad that someone will always listen to my cries, cause I tend to do that quite often. And here it says that He hears my cries. I feel fortunate to have a loving…patient husband who listens to me when I need someone to talk to but God is always listening to me waiting for me to cry out for Him. Be sensitive- Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience~~Colossians 3:12 I think we should keep our ears open to those who need to share and who need comfort, whether they know God are not. And to show compassion to those who are in need, cause there may come a time when I will need someone to be sensitive and have compassion for me. One of my favorite songs right now is by JJ Heller called “Your hands”, the chorus says “When my world is shaking, heaven stands, When my heart is breaking I never leave your hands.” Man those words just about bring me to tears, who am I kidding they do bring me to tears, cause I need to tell myself quite often how Heaven will always stand no matter what is going on in my world and how I need my Lord when my heart breaks and how He will hold my hand through everything! Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before~~Philippians 3:13 I really do not have anything to go with this verse but am thinking that this is really what I should aim for not to let the things that are behind me hinder me from attaining the joy that God has for before me! Don’t give up-Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up~~Galations 6:9 What is kinda funny about this verse is because the next verse is one of my favorite verses talking about when we have opportunity we should do good, well this past Sunday at church our pastor was talking about verse 9 and how even though we are going through tough times we should never give up. I had actually told my husband that I was not giving up I was just simply sitting on the bench, you know a benchwarmer. So God has really convicted me of that so now I am back in the game, so to speak. May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.~~Romans 15:13